Sending Love and Support for Becky, Oliver & Charlie
Hi Everyone,Thanks for making it this far with us.
If you're reading this, I know you've made a difference in our lives. And that maybe Violet has made one in yours.These past few weeks have certainly been a lot to endure. While have we been overwhelmed with unimaginable grief, we have also been overwhelmed with an outpouring of love.The physical and emotional support surrounding us from all over the world has been what has gotten us this far.
Many of you have asked about how you may be able to offer support, we are so fortunate to have so much love in our lives. Our friends have collaborated to make this website, where we could put all the information you might want in one place.To be perfectly honest, we are still in a state of shock ourselves. Violet died so unexpectedly and suddenly. The cause of death remains unknown.. an unpredictable, unsolvable medical mystery, which is a struggle to understand for all of us.
Her absence is felt so deeply.
However, one thing I am discovering is that just because an experience is rare, doesnt mean we are alone in it.Through this incredibly difficult time, the moments of connection with her have been incredibly surreal.We feel these connections in the relationships that have unfolded, the way Charlie processes everything so differently, and the messages of love and deep condolences. They are also in the books that Charlie picks, the songs that come on the radio, and time in nature (when it's agreeing with us).. There are so many moments every day, it really feels like she's always with us.
Charlie has unknowingly kept us standing strong, and always on our toes. He has really grown up a lot in the past few weeks. We've done our best to keep his routine as “normal” as possible. He spends a lot of time with his best friend, Mia, and buddies at his daycare. He is in swimming lessons, dance lessons, will be starting soccer in May, and school in September. He has many questions about his sister, and not all of them we know how to answer, but we’re doing our best. We make sure to blow her a kiss, and catch one every night.. he has started making sure we do it at the exact same time.My friend Caitlin, Mia’s mom, has been so immensely supportive with anything and everything. She and her family have stood with ours completely in this trying time, and it will forever mean everything to us how comfortable Charlie is with her. She began organizing a “meal train” with friends, which has been nothing short of incredible. Don't underestimate the power of a good meal.
I had no idea how difficult it would be to keep up with regular every day tasks, or to have an interaction with the cashier. Not having to think of buying groceries, or finding the time and energy to make a meal, has been so relieving and unbelievably helpful.Oliver has gone back to work, and with the recent ice storm he's been extremely exhausted, understandably. Even though he’s been so tired every day, he’s been prioritizing attending therapy sessions and really recognizes the importance of processing his grief. The meals that people have dropped off have been so helpful because we can put our time and attention toward taking care of each other. Despite any moments of struggle, Charlie continues to see him as his favourite super hero.I am doing my best to navigate this new life that's been dealt to us. I'm doing my best to take care of myself so I can be there for my family. I have been reaching out to as many resources as possible to get the help that I think our family will need. We know the road we’re on is going to be a long one.This has been such a deep process of self discovery, I can’t yet find the words to share more about how I’m doing. I find myself more open to exploring what life is and what it means. It feels like there must be a greater story or purpose for all of this that is completely outside our full understanding.I feel proud that I’m still standing.I just keep thinking about Violet, and she knows who I am. She wouldn’t want me to be sad all the time. I think of her, and sometimes I just start smiling through my tears, because she would want to see me smile. I can’t help it.Adjusting to a new life at home has been a quiet and guarded process. We have appreciated people giving us space for that, and at the same time our friends and families are so dear to our hearts. I hope I can reach out to each one of you when the time is right.Thank you so much for all of your love and support.
Thank you for just being there for us.
Thank you isn’t enough for all you’ve done, and continue to do.
We love you all very much.💜 Becky
It’s hard for me to find the right words.I could say a million things.I want to say so much yet I struggle.The death of our daughter Violet has left me feeling absolutely crushed.
As a Father, I am very much struggling with the loss of my daughter.I am heartbroken, confused, sad, angry and lost all at the same time.
The eternal love I have for Violet will never fade - it will only grow stronger.
Yet I am left here - in the darkest point in my life.And when it all feels like it's closing in on me there is a light.❤️ Charlie is my light ❤️He will truly never know how much I need him right now.He looks to me for love and guidance, and is my constant reminder that my role as a parent doesn't just end.He acts as my shadow, and when I feel as though my light has faded, he’s always showing me that becoming a Father has been my proudest achievement in life.- Oliver
“Violet”
By: Charlie
Join the Meal Train
The Meal Train website simplifies the organization of meal giving around significant life events. It is rooted in the idea that a meal is a symbolic gesture of one person’s willingness to help another. The meal is a vehicle that allows the giving party the opportunity to show they care, that they hope to reduce a burden, and they will be there for the receiving party in the future.
Click below to go directly to Becky & Oliver’s Meal Train and create your account.
If you have any questions, contact Caitlin: [email protected]
Send support via PayPal or etransfer
Your contributions will allow Becky, Oliver, and Charlie to seek necessary therapy and provide a cushion for Becky and Oliver to take the time they need to heal without financial concern.
For those in Canada, etransfer is an available option: [email protected]
For those who’s efforts are limited by location, PayPal is a free and easy way to send funds directly from and to bank accounts all over the world.
Add Becky to your PayPal contacts list using [email protected]
Remember to select “Friends & Family” to bypass transaction fees.
